night represents the unconscious

hye y'all,

          Yesterday was disaster.A girl sitting all by herself in front of her lappy hoping that today gonna be better and blast while in fact everyday is a blast.She is waiting for a hot cup of coffee and a slice of nearly expired bread for craving of.She keep herself busy.Time goes faster that way emm yeah time goes faster that way.She wait for something ,the truth she wait for someone.Each moment that she wait feels like a year,an eternity.

          She had made a decision and she hope that he will understand and realize one day why she had to do so.Whether the decision she had made was right or wrong she will never know.they had tried and she had no choice and even if it is hurt it will be worth it. Sometime she is glad he's gone.sometime not.She starring out of the window with a little teary.her knees buckle.it's cold as the wind cut right through her old night shirt.She isn't sure who she is.Everyday she feels like a death.Then she lying on the floor in her room.She is alone.alone again.She lie there swearing and feeling like an idiot for a while...

          Everyday in her pray, she ask a lot from god but most of the time god doesn't grant her wish but wutever happen she will always be grateful, Alhamdulillah for the rest of the good things happen in her life

          She always want her life to be a fairy tale while in fact she's not a princess who's waiting for a prince charming with a white horse come and take her to the heaven.ahh.She just an ordinary girl with a humdrum life where she always sick of.Last night she had a dream where she find herself in the dark space met a chivalrous prince and he call her a princess.They walking pass the garden wherein beautiful cherries are hanging with a flower in her head.Fairy tale life is too sweet to be true while she is still there wearing her outworn shirt with the books all over her and 1 month left to be undergraduates student,she is taking hold of all the time remain to study for her final.

         She just want a happy ending fairy tale story of her life but it is far from what she imagines.At least for now.but there's no reason for her to stop having a faith in them.

          Pliss stop seeking for her love as she had give it all to you before but u don't even appreciate it and you don't have any idea how much she had hurt foolishly seek for ur true love before!It's not the goodbye that hurt but the memory remained that hurt the most so go away.she don't want to hate u for the rest of her life.so just go away.if u want her heart again u better ask from the god as HE is the one that hold her heart now.

pen off



  1. sungguh menyakitkan hati bila saya baca ini as i can understand how much u hurt :)

  2. it hurt so much
    tq wanie 4 ur understanding.

  3. salam ziarah dear,

    don't worry ok. time heals everything. kena byk2 berdoa pada Allah ya.